Where has my creation urge gone?

It has been an amazingly long time since I've written on this blog, or even looked at it for that matter.

I pay to keep a domain name for this site, because I have not yet figured out how to build and maintain a website. I literally paid for the second year of this domain and didn't even bother to check out how it's even looking over a month ago.

Now I've finally looked and I can see that it's not looking good.

Has my creativity dried up and left me? Did I stop being an artist May of last year? Life was definitely different back then. I was working a terrible job that I made little money doing, one a long line of bad jobs I've had in Albany, NY. I still tried to find time to create and do what I loved but not in the same way as it was when I needed to create things for a grade. I have a lot less stress than I did when I was in art school but I also don't do much.

I have worked two jobs for over a year now. One is being a cocktail waitress at the City Beer Hall. It is fun and even when I'm not making all that much money I'm still making money. The second is Lifetouch, which is a seasonal job going to local (within two hours drive) schools and taking pictures of kids for their yearbook and spring pictures. My second fall season is about to start at Lifetouch and I'm apprehensive about it. I know it will be taking up a lot of my time. Usually I am working overtime every week. In addition to the hours at CBH, which are minimal but still labor intensive and can be exhausting. Together it's pretty brutal. Now that CBH serves brunch and I work almost every one I won't even have a day off.

All of those impending time suckers are nerve wracking. But what makes me more annoyed is that I've had a good long while of hardly doing anything all day every day... and I've made no use of my free time.

Of course I did put together a wedding, including making my dress from scratch.

I also love spending time with Rod, our favorite pass time together is watching movies. We even keep track of all the movies we watch together.

August of movie watching

We've spent a lot of time trying to get our apartment back together after the state of disaster it was in post wedding. DIY weddings mean a lot of work and a lot of storing. After the wedding we still have a lifetime supply of party supplies (plates, cups, forks, knives, spoons, lights etc.)... thankfully we have access to a basement where all of that is stored in four large tubs, the same tubs that held ice around our kegs during the wedding.

There is also the problem of us both being artists, who no longer have studios. Rod was most recently kicked out of his about a month before the wedding. Even before all of this stuff was not in our tiny back room it was still a tiny back room that did not function well as a studio space for either one of us. I always ended up taking my book making out into the living room etc. I really don't know why this is, maybe because the spaces we designate for one thing always end up not working out to serve the purpose we intended. 

Anyways... this is the situation we're looking at now:

Entering (note this is actually better than it was, we cleared the doorway so we could go to our back patio)

Rounding the corner

And that's a mess

So we need to get rid of a lot of shit before anything can be made here. But that's the conundrum... we need a lot of that shit to make shit. Or maybe we just feel like we need it?